Jack Kaiser

November 18, 1996

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Well Hello again, and here's this week's chicken scratch from the keyboard on high... (quite a ring to it... ;) ) I went to JMU this past weekend, and had a GREAT time! Had to run a meeting for the coordination of the Catholic weekend I'm in charge of in January... It went absolutely fabulously! Everyone clicked, and my only gripe was that the whole team was not present, so I couldn't go over "utterly crucial" material that EVERYONE needs to hear... guess it'll have to wait till next time ;). I left JMU to return to Williamsburg at around 1:00, since I had to be back here for a 7:15 dessert with the cast of the UC and Rick Munoz. I have to say, I just didn't know what to expect... I mean, I'm really quite the average joe (right...) on the street, and I'd never met anyone that my only correspondence with was over the 'net. So, as I said, I just didn't know what to expect... Got there, and desserted (don't you hate that... when some jerk who thinks he's God's gift to the english language goes and makes himself a verb out of a God damn noun?!?! I mean, really guys... dessert is a noun, I'm absolutely sure that almost 100% of you were ready to let me get away with "desserted"... DON'T! It's Garbage! Come on... things like picnicked? these are not good words... whether or not Webster thinks so... use some common sense, now back to our regularly scheduled post) with Bill, Caitlyn, Dave, Rick, and Madeleine. It was really kinda fun. Rick turned out to be a great guy, lotsa fun, and we kicked back with some coffee and sundaes, and 70's tunes at Ruby Tuesday's. Let me just tell you, Rick, Bill and me all chiming in at just the right time on that high pitched "Shaft" note... Chilled the soul... (By the way... Who IS the private dick who's a sex machine with all the ladies? JACK (in that requisite "Shaft" high note voice) come on, sing it to yourself wherever you happen to be sitting... you know it's just sooo right... ;) ) The night ended, and we all returned to our little homes on campus to while the night away...

I'd just like to say something about a dessert topic, though. We began to talk a little bit about Cable, as Rick pointed out that he was a cable installer, or repairman, or something or other... (I mean, he's not NOW, he WAS before...) The College of William and Mary has promised me cable. They promised it to me at the beginning of my freshman year. They promised it to the class before me, and the class before them, back to the beginning of time, cable was promised. The students had come to accept that it was an empty promise, and were content to give it their yearly bitch, when all of a sudden this summer, work was beginning! I could not believe my eyes! I was seeing the cable men putting blessed holes in the walls, and stringing beautifully useless miles of cable all over everything. I got really excited when the beginning of the year rolled around and there were cable guys in my real room for this year. They installed a box in my wall that had places for cables and hookups and other stuff that I was sure I'd never get to use... They came through about 5 times... Here's the steps the cable men took in installing my cable box...

Now, bear in mind that each of the steps, one through five, was executed during a SEPARATE visit to my humble abode! They didn't come in, drill the damn hole, fill it with the dumb box, label it and leave... NOOOOO, they came, made the hole... left it there, came back days later, put the box in, left... You get the idea... DUMB DUMB DUMB! Guys, lemme tell you something... there's something to be said for customer satisfaction, and comin' into my room five damn times don't get me satisfied! Thankfully, they're done IN the room. That does NOT preclude, mind you, the hall...

The hall presently looks like a cable spiderweb. I just have to tell you... It just sucks to have to get up in the morning, leave the room, and on the way to the shower, navigate a maze to rival something out of one of those outward bound courses, or maybe a video game jungle or something... BUT, you are SOOOO careful to not mess up the wires, since through those veins courses the blood of all that is good about campus communication... my phone, my promised cable... I mean, we told campus about it, work ordered it and all, and they came... oh did they come... You know what they did? They duct taped the wires to the wall above head level. That held them for about a day... and I'm being generous with the times here... DUCT TAPE?!? Come on... Yeah, that's a good solution... Stick the wires to the painted concrete wall with duct tape. Not only does duct tape not stick well to painted concrete, but you wanna talk about a crap job... What do they plan to do with these hall wires later... why not just get off your cable guy ass and fix it right the first time... NOW! Well, enough of the cable thing, but suffice as to say, the hall's a bloody mess, and the cable is not in working order yet... Some things never change, like empty promises from the man...

YOU DON'T KNOW JACK!

jxkais@maila.wm.edu

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